Stokesley M2s 0 - 2 Durham City M2s

It was a very wet and foggy morning outside Maiden Castle where DCHC M2s met at before 9am for an away day to Stokesley. With the authors hair trimmed and ready to go, the team made their way to the match.

Shez, who had decided to get the bus direct to Middlesbrough, messaged Chris in a whirlwind of panic. He needed the toilet. Badly. His search for public facilities had lead him round half of Thornaby until he was able to find a shop that would let him ruin their loo. Chris eventually found him many miles from the bus station, many miles in the opposite direction to the pitch.

Things weren't going much better for Thomas, who on getting changed, realised he'd forgotten his astros. Unfortunately, along with forgetting to use the bathroom before he left, Shez had also forgotten the legendary going out astros, so Thomas spent the whole game in his pair of retro addidas Sambas. Minutes before the game began, Dan Pudwell, still looking like the teams coach, also decided he needed to empty his bowels but just about made it back before the game began.

The game started and although Durham had the best opportunities, neither side were able to finish them off. Half-way through the first half though, Shez, lighter than usual, fell upon a loose ball from the Stokesley defender and at a tight angle unleashed a furious tomahawk into the bottom corner. Durham led, and continued to press as Adam worked his way down the right hand side and played a lovely pass across the D for Dan Pudwell to completely miss the ball. A few minutes later, another gilt edged chance presented itself to Dan, this time managing to strike the ball, somewhat, conspiring to accidentally loop the ball up to hit the angle between the post and bar.

As the game went on, Durham became increasingly dominant until after a rare period of Stokesley pressure, they took a shot. Jack saved well and, turned to his right to follow the ball. In doing so, his foot made contact with the ball which went over the back line. The umpire adjudged this to be an intentional play off the backline and immediately awarded a short corner. Stokesley, being gentlemen, agreed that this wasn't a short and the captain played it off our backline for a 16, incredibly sporting behaviour worthy of appreciation.

As the half drew to a conclusion and with Durham on top, the game began to get a bit physical with very few fouls given. When Chris Brown asked the umpire whether he intended to give any, he was promptly shown a green.

The half second half began with Chris still sidelined and Dan Pudwell inexplicably filling in as CB. The physicality of the game showed itself with a number of players going to ground, including a particularly acrobatic effort from Timmy Hassell. A few minutes later a Stokesley error led to Timmy picking up the ball in the opposition D and finding himself one-on-one with the 'keeper. Just before shooting an urgent call to square the ball resulted in him neither finding the back of the net, nor the sprinting Adam as he well and truly, fluffed his lines.

As the game continued, Durham continued to press and eventually lead to Thomas hitting a clean shot into the bottom corner, the Sambas clearly paying off and Durham looked good for a 2-0 lead. Other than the highest aerial any of us had ever seen from Chris, there was relatively little else of note in part due to excellent defensive work from Jonny and Jack's commanding presence in goal.

A return to winning ways and great news for the men in gold as other results went their way meaning they finished the weekend top of the table! The team retired to an unconventional setting (a church turned into a pub) for what was one of the best teas of the year (homemade curry).

MOM - a tie between Ciaran for some great work and running in midfield and Jonny for some excellent defensive work throughout.

DOD - Dan for misses, last minute toilet drama whilst looking like the manager, losing the masks and getting told off for talking to the umpire.

#Sambasnotastros
#teamtoilettrips
#teamcurry
#hockeyoverfootball