Doncaster M2s 0 - 5 Durham City M1s

The day had arrived. Never had a game been so highly anticipated. At least not since the Europa Conference final last year (COYI). Historians will compare such days to epochal turning points of the past. The Battles of Marathon, Hastings and Bannockburn will fade to a pale insignificance in comparison. The first leg of the table topping doubleheader was upon us. Durham versus Doncaster 2s.

Five cars set off in pursuit of another victory to maintain our flawless start to the season: the ‘Fun’ky Fiesta was burdened with the student contingent; Duncan led the ‘had to leave early crew’; the Kettley massive, contained half of our travelling fans, all two of them; the care home convoy had well over sixty years of hockey experience between them and JB came on his lonesome. A ritual stop at Wetherby services spawned a new and exciting collaborative playlist, the brainchild of DJ Peters. The final composition, with additions by the infamous ‘Gulpe’ added to an eclectic mix that reflected the diverse characters in the team. Though the tunes wouldn’t be out of place when carving up of the D-floor in Jimmies.

All fun and games aside, everyone was ready for the crucial fixture that lay ahead, a win today would put Durham ten points clear of Doncaster and give us a significant boost for the return fixture next week. As expected, the game began very evenly as both teams attempted to work out their counterpart. Durham struck the first blow just after the five-minute mark when an attack down the left-hand side forced the opposition keeper into an early save. The rebound bounced awkwardly to the middle of the D. Anth was poised and he elegantly rose onto his tiptoes to punch the ball off the back foot, like a prime Joe Root, into the goal for the opener. A perfect start. Durham had an intensity that was infectious. Even Rob had caught the bug. Something that even the Donny coaching team noticed as he went on a signature one handed reverse run, they were heard stating “wow this guy’s quick” to the amusement of the Durham bench. To clarify things, a mandatory sprint race has been called for tuesday training.

A second goal was to arrive mid-way through the first half. Will received it on the edge of the D and after the initial delivery bounced off a Donny foot, he didn’t give it up, beating one and driving along the baseline he managed to manufacture a pass to “Matty” K, who snuck the ball in. Credit goes to the umpires here who played successive advantages that allowed us to get the second goal. Two-nil, Durham were now firmly on top. The entire forward line must have eaten whatever Shez has for breakfast as it was non-stop energy. Today Durham City didn’t just have the one Wasp on the pitch but an entire army of yellow and black pests. Multiple times throughout the first half turnovers led to fast paced counter attacks, one of which could have provided the killer ‘sting’ but for the Matt K’s reverse to be blazed over the bar. The energy up front was well tempered by the calmer possession hockey of the backline. Even when Durham were down to ten men after Duncan was green carded for a not so elegant stick tackle, Doncaster didn’t get a sniff and they were restricted to a chanceless opening thirty-five. Blair was once again rather idle in goal; a single kick was his entire action for the first half.

More of the same was ordered at the break. The same and better was delivered. For the opening few minutes of the second period, play was restricted to Donny’s half as they struggled to beat the press. A resulting short corner allowed Durham to extend their lead further. Mason stepped up and the drag flick missed everything to nestle in the bottom right corner. Three-nil. A deficit that looked unrecoverable. Again the press forced Donny to play into eagerly waiting Durham midfielders, like sharks snapping at the feet of unwary swimmers. One of these turnovers was converted as the ball was played across the D to Ben who thanked the service by extended Durham’s lead to four. Durham were in dreamland, never would the thought of nine straight wins have crossed the mind of anyone three months prior but now Durham were on the verge of a crucial away win. The Donny coaching team were still in full voice despite the scoreline, as they commented on the haircut of a certain fullback author. There was time for one final Durham goal to put the proverbial cherry squarely on top of the cake. Another save fell to John at the top of the D who unleashed a vicious reverse stick shot. It could have been a fitting finish to a very professional performance if it had not been for the poacher’s instinct of Matt K. Not satisfied with the one goal for the day the skipper somehow “controlled” the ball with his stick chest high, robbing John of a magnificent goal. The resulting speed at which the ball dribbled across the line makes continental drift seem like an olympic sprinter. However, it was a goal, nonetheless. Five-nil. Game over. Three points won.

Today was characterised by both an excellent team performance where everyone was faultless and a plethora of new nicknames. The ‘Kettle’ brothers will now be gracing the field for Durham City from now on. Mason has been christened an unmentionable nickname by a Donny midfielder and the infamous predictive text from an early 2000’s Nokia has illuminated ‘Gulpe’ to the team.

The journey back was filled with a joyous sing-along to the brand-new playlist and a much-needed stop at KFC. Donny will be out to prove themselves after this weekend’s result and so Durham will have to put in another fine performance to take the winning streak to ten games.

MOM – Anth ‘Gulpe’. Some outrageous takedowns of aerials and a great finish.

DOD - Duncan. ‘Handbrakegate’ and a card.

#HeadandShoulders #LittleB #Awaygoalsdontcountdouble